i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Randomize
