:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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