Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize