what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
