It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize