he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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