Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
