I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
