i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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