The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
