i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize
