dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
