i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
My bed smells like the plague
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
