he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
