Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize