i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
