You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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