Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
When did angry sex become our thing?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize