Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize