they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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