I love black thongs
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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