the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
