i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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