Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
