my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
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