It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
