Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
