The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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