Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Randomize