i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
we're making bets on your personal life
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
