I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
