So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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