he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
