we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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