there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
