she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
