My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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