That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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