The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
