Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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