ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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