the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
