I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
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