wat bout pragnant strippers??
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
