My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
