dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
