If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize