Dual....:-)
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
