And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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