? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
